Attn: Consumer Affairs

Dear Trader Joe's,

Well, you got me again. Between Thanksgiving and Christmas, I sampled and subsequently became hooked on your dark chocolate peanut butter cups. I hope the Reese's people aren't offended when I declare to you that your product is superior in yumminess. I was rationing myself effectively by buying the small packages containing nine cups (aka three single servings) each. But after the holidays, they were nowhere to be found. Oh, you still carry the plastic box (with a newly raised price) containing three times as much, but with the cups wrapped only in foil, I could no longer ration my daily intake because there was no airtight bag to slow me down! Since I am unwilling to pay more than $4.00 for a bag of candy, I am forced to get over my addiction without even the opportunity to taper off.

You have pulled this before, Trader Joe's. You once carried a terrific breakfast bar with dark chocolate chips, and one day the entire product was gone. I was told that the bars, which I had been eating for over a year without incident, had been voluntarily recalled for potentially dangerous bacteria or some such. C'mon, T.J.'s! Shouldn't I have been given the opportunity to decide whether to take my chances before it became unavailable? I waited for almost a year for its return, and in the process was forced to consume junky alternatives containing high fructose corn syrup! The bars are back, thank goodness, but I'm not sure they were worth the long wait.

Same goes for Trader Joe's brand of Spinach Pie. The T.J. version of spanakopita was a great vegetarian entree for work because it could be eaten hot or at room temperature. But when I needed dinners for my night job, no more pie. For the holidays or forever? I still can't get a straight answer.

Years ago I made a delicious discovery. For about a minute one October, Trader Joe's put out its famously addictive tiny chocolate chip cookies in single servings. It was the greatest thing to happen to my lack of self-control since ziploc freezer bags. And then they were gone. I learned after the fact that the snack size boxes were for Halloween only. Again I must ask: why, T.J., why?

If you persist in getting me hooked on products you intend to take away, at least include a warning on the package. "Be advised, this product in its current form is available for a limited time only, so don't get too attached."

* * * *

Dear Starbucks,

I don't drink coffee so, granted, I am not your #1 customer. But most people I know enjoy your joe so I often find myself in your establishments and in need of a beverage. My drink of choice is iced tea but since you refuse (see previous correspondence) to provide lemon, last week I opted for hot tea. It was served really hot. Too hot to drink, in fact.

For to-go orders, I can see the logic of providing scalding hot beverages that will cool off en route to their destination. But I am drinking it at Starbucks! How long do you think I want to wait once I've walked it to my table before bringing cup to mouth? I am baffled as to why anyone would want to be served scalding hot beverage for immediate consumption. Not so refreshing.

So here's my idea: Why not serve items at temperatures that complement my palate rather than burn the roof of my mouth? Just a thought.

Goodbye and Good Riddance, 2011!

Happy New Year to us all! And by happy I mean compared to the year we are seeing off. In other words, I truly hope and expect that 2012 is more enjoyable and a lot more prosperous than 2011.

Seriously.

Jon Huntsman on Trump Moderating GOP Debate

"This is not about ratings for Donald Trump, this is about jobs for the American people. This is a serious debate that we ought to be having here in the United States," he said on NBC's Today. "I believe that the presidency of the United States of America is beyond reality shows. This is a joke."

I can't believe I'm agreeing with such a conservative candidate but, Amen, Brudda!

(God forbid someone holds a debate where the American people actually learn something about the candidates' platforms and where they stand on real issues. Might scare off the lowest common denominator.)

How hard it is to get good news reported

I am momentarily speechless. Here's the story:

http://www.chron.com/news/article/Utah-mayor-used-alias-to-write-upbeat-news-stories-2264370.php

At least someone is noticing...
http://www.deadline.com/2011/11/should-the-fcc-crack-down-on-tv-stations-that-cooperate-on-news-ad-sales-and-retransmission-deals/

Why bother with multiple sources when you don't have multiple outlets?

27 Stations Use Same Lead for Conan Story

This would be funny if it didn't enrage me.

Excerpted from MediaBistro.com - "The likely explanation is that wire copy associated with the original source contained the phrase, which then made its way into scripts and onto prompters with little editing. Local news is increasingly under fire for content sharing, which the RTDNA recently discovered that a whopping 78% of stations do."

Here's the link to the whole story:
http://www.mediabistro.com/tvspy/while-covering-a-conan-obrien-story-18-local-stations-use-identical-phrasing_b27924

So, have anchors' vocabularies diminished to such an extent that they all must use the exact same words now? Nah, this is just the result of extreme consolidation and forced sharing of resources in news media. Who needs accuracy when you can have consistency?

Tell me again: Why should I care?

One recurring theme to this blog is my frustration with the entertainmentization of the news by most media—the moving away from relevant news and toward celebrity-focused content. Even though I was too young to appreciate when the news was considered a community service and a public trust, I really miss the concept.

What passes for news these days is not relevant, not news, and not even worth knowing.

Exhibit A: Nonstop coverage of the trial of Michael Jackson's doctor, Conrad Murray, who is accused of causing the singer's death. Even if there were some evil motive behind what happened, as opposed to it being just a tragic mistake, it still wouldn't merit such extreme attention. To whom does this case matter in the real world?

Exhibit B: Breathless coverage of the back entrance to the Tonight Show with Jay Leno, because the President of the United States's car would soon be entering. Not newsworthy.

Exhibit C: Top story at noon: famous-for-no-good-reason Kim Kardashian filing for divorce from a white athlete after what must have been a hellish two months of marriage. I'm sick that I even know who this couple is although it gives me an idea for a new policy on giving wedding gifts...

Exhibit D: Allegations that presidential candidate Herman Cain was accused of sexual harassment by two different women 20 years ago. I'm not even going to argue about this story's relevance. My bigger concern is that this story came from one, and only one, source: Politico.com. Yes, the site has a great reputation. But it seems no other media outlets even feel the need to confirm this story with any independent investigations of their own, despite the fact that EVERY ONE OF THEM is retelling this story. That's not reporting, it's repeating. You know, like gossip.

Maybe in addition to having a "Most Popular" category, websites could also introduce a "Most Relevant." Instead of corporate moguls letting individuals decide what is news, howzabout just giving us actual news? And when I want something else, I'll go to TMZ.

Latest Brilliant Idea

Another genius idea for someone else to take and run with:

While a Like button and even a Dislike button are useful, they are not terribly helpful with specifics. How about being able to express different degrees of online Like?

LIKE LIKE - You might want to use this designation when you like a person who perhaps doesn't know your feelings, perhaps because you are in junior high school.

LIKE BUT - From high school on, you will likely find yourself more than once in a situation where you Like someone, but not the way he/she likes you.

LIKE MORE - Your feelings are growing for this person. Perhaps he/she has done something recently to get your attention and interest. This shows it was a success!

LIKE NOT - Someone you definitely liked at another time, but no longer do.

LIKE SO - You like someone who thinks you don't, and you want to set him/her straight.

LIKEWISE - To describe a person with whom you have a lot in common. And people who like us must be wise, right?