Dear Trader Joe's,
I can't believe you are out of all your holiday foods the day after Christmas. Yeah, they're popular. I get it. But I couldn't afford to buy myself anything until after the holidays. Has it ever occurred to you, Joe's, that some of your customers might receive gift cards that we can now spend at your store? Except all of your dark chocolate peppermints and chocolate-dipped ginger cookies and passport collection chocolate bars (I think you get the idea here) are gone for the season!
Please, Joe's, stop discriminating against non-gentiles and people who rely on gifts to splurge on ourselves. Save some of the holiday merchandise for after the holidays!
Yours,
The Female Curmudgeon
p.s. And it wouldn't kill you to pick my ticket stub once in 10 years or so to win a gift card for bringing my own damn bags.
