Mother's Day Irony

It was just Mother's Day, and I know it's one of the biggest restaurant days of the year. (Brunch rules!) But when I think of Mother's Day, what I DON'T think of is sex.

For the mothers I know, if it's up to them, sex isn't top of the list on their "special" day. Could it be that on the day that is celebrated because Mom had sex with Dad, that there is less sex going on than on any other day?

End of Month Special

Once again, one news story has usurped all of the newscasters' reporting. First it was the Boston Marathon bombing, then it was the Texas explosion, now it's back to investigation of the bombing.

I'm pretty sure there are other important stories going uncovered right now: Like the helium shortage, a cybersecurity bill passing in the House, and the Affordable Care Act (aka "Obamacare") going into effect.

Why must I work so hard to get real news?

Newsflash: Texting while Driving BAD!

As a rabid opponent of using a cellphone while driving, I am not surprised to hear the results of a new study
(http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/03/28/adults-worse-than-teens-about-texting-behind-wheel/2026331/)
declaring that nearly half of all those surveyed do text and drive, despite the fact that almost all of the people surveyed know it is dangerous.

They needed a study for this?

Pope Talk

I mean no disrespect to the outgoing Pope, but what's with all the talk about what he'll do in his "retirement" when, really, does anyone think it'll be a long, productive one?

If you ask me, all the money and effort being spent on remodeling his next forever home seem like a big waste and short-sighted.

After all, if the guy thought he had a fruitful future ahead, he would have kept the job till death parted him from it, as I understand is the custom.

So Catholics, pay your respects, and Mainstream Media, marvel at and over-report this once in a lifetime royal resignation, but please stop speculating about what's ahead for the first Pope Emeritus. It's the same future that awaits us all.

First Curmudgeon Consumer of the New Year

Dear Trader Joe's,

I can't believe you are out of all your holiday foods the day after Christmas. Yeah, they're popular. I get it. But I couldn't afford to buy myself anything until after the holidays. Has it ever occurred to you, Joe's, that some of your customers might receive gift cards that we can now spend at your store? Except all of your dark chocolate peppermints and chocolate-dipped ginger cookies and passport collection chocolate bars (I think you get the idea here) are gone for the season!

Please, Joe's, stop discriminating against non-gentiles and people who rely on gifts to splurge on ourselves. Save some of the holiday merchandise for after the holidays!

Yours,
The Female Curmudgeon

p.s. And it wouldn't kill you to pick my ticket stub once in 10 years or so to win a gift card for bringing my own damn bags.

1st Great Idea of 2013

You know how they have "undocumented" workers hanging outside of Home Depot and Lowe's? They are there to help you with what you just purchased inside the store.

We could really use this for places that sell computers, printers, and anything technical.

Outside of Best Buy, Fry's, or even Target, instead of guys in jeans and T-shirts, there could be freelance geeks, dressed in rogue Geek Squad white button-down shirt and black tie, ready for hiring on the spot. You negotiate a price, drive them to your home and let them put everything together for you.

Then later, when your 2-year-old computer gets a particularly tricky virus, you can return to the store's parking lot and bring home a geek to fix your latest problems.

How great would that be?

Last Minute Random Thoughts

I was wondering, "Where is Waldo?" It occurs to me I have never met or heard of anyone actually named Waldo. Did that name fall out of favor, or was it always rare?

Great vocabulary words for today: deft, flourish. Both are also fun to say!

See you in 2013!